YOU be the judge!

[offbalance]

A few week's back, quasisonic, Puck, and I celebrated mother's day with my parents at a delicious brunch cooked by my dad. Now, my dad makes better breakfast food than almost anyone I know, and that day he made his famous matzoh brei, which I swear would be a HUGE brunch food staple if only adopted by the right collection of restaurants, but I digress. Anyway, while we were over enjoying the food and the company, we were also enjoying TBS's Indiana Jones marathon. We got there in time for the first Indy movie I ever remember seeing: Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. Now, I know it doesn't even come close to Raiders of the Lost Ark, but I've always had a fond place for Last Crusade in my heart. I hadn't seen Temple of Doom in ages, but I just remembered not liking it all that much.

When Temple of Doom came on, we decided to watch it just to see it was as bad as we remembered. And to be honest, most of the party found it to be far worse than we all thought. Between Kate Capshaw's shrieking, the bugs, and Indy acting nothing like the guy we'd come to know and love (and dialog that made Lucas's work in the Star Wars Prequels look Pulitzer-worthy). While I was enduring this monstrosity, I texted my boyfriend (yes. I have one now. We've been together about a month, he's awesome, fun, and most importantly, as geeky as I am) that I'd forgotten how much Temple of Doom straight up sucked.

He emphatically disagreed. He did concede the point of Willie Stark being annoying, but according to him, all the other elements of the movie (including that AWFUL scene with the bugs) more than made up for it, and, that it was way better than Last Crusade! We argued about this for at least half an hour via text message and for another half an hour when I saw him again later on, but we could only agree to disagree. He refused to see that Last Crusade was a spectacular return to form for the franchise, with its multi-continent quest to find this great relic, the inclusion of all the characters we'd come to love (Marcus! Sallah!) as well as the introduction of Indiana's father. (Sean Connery trumps all. Thank you.) Not to mention a female character that wasn't completely annoying. Granted, she was no Marion Ravenwood (who could be?), but she wasn't bad, either. The action sequences were plausible, the quest comprehensible, and the dialog quotable. It was good-hearted, adventured-filled, action-packed fun. All things that Temple just weren't.

I jokingly suggested that I should put it to a vote in my blog, and he loved the idea. So, ladies and gentlemen of the livejournal jury, I put it to you. All will agree that Raiders of the Lost Ark is the masterpiece of the three we've seen so far, but which is the second best?

[Poll #1191479]

There is no I can't decide option. You must choose. And if you want to debate, please feel free to do so in the comments. Let the battle royale begin!

Comments

[firynze.livejournal.com]

Temple of Doom is a hilarious movie, but I will maintain lo unto my dying breath that it is not, in fact, an Indiana Jones movie.

In fact, I've been known to refer to it as The Movie That Shall Not Be Named.

[offbalance.livejournal.com]

Exactly. My dad is annoyed he even owns it. (It made more sense to buy the boxed set than to buy the movies individually on dvd. But he only owned Raiders and Last Crusade on VHS!)

(edit: mind if I gank your icon? I loveses it!)

[firynze.livejournal.com]

That's the only reason to own it, as far as I'm concerned.

(I admit, it's a funny-ass movie, in the Einsteinian Suckage sense. But IT IS NOT INDY DAMNIT)

[offbalance.livejournal.com]

I couldn't agree more!

[firynze.livejournal.com]

Gank away! I'm quite proud of that one.

[offbalance.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

[valjean615.livejournal.com]

Heh. Those are the two Indy movies that I own on VHS too. Temple of Doom was my first of the Indiana Jones movies that I saw (which I remember seeing in the Elmhurst Theater with Star Trek III playing on the screen next door...talk about subpar movies). I just remembered the dinner scene with the chilled monkey brains. It was amusing enough, but the other two were leap years better and instant classics in my mind.

[offbalance.livejournal.com]

I want to say I saw Last Crusade in the theater, but I honestly do not remember. But I agree - Raiders and Last Crusade are total classics. Not so much with Temple of Doom.

As for ST:III, well, it wasn't great. But it certainly wasn't Star Trek:V. That was one of the worst sins ever committed on celluloid.

[valjean615.livejournal.com]

I think I ended up seeing Last Crusade in the same theater or if not then it would have been in Forest Hills. As a kid, I used to hit the cheap matinees in Queens frequently during the summer.

Oh good lord, Star Trek V was so bad that it made me cry when I saw it at the Embassy 2,3,4 Theater. Though I think that was partly because we got there late and had to sit in the second row of the theater, making my neck not all that happy.

[offbalance.livejournal.com]

That's cool. If we'd lived near more theaters when I was growing up, I might have done the same.

The first time I saw Star Trek V, it was on video, and I was with my dad and my grandpa. We were sitting on the sofa watching it, and during the "Row Row Your Boat" scene I asked why this was happening. My dad said, "Someone decided that Shatner directing a movie was a GOOD idea."

[valjean615.livejournal.com]

Yeah..The G train was my friend, before they stripped it of its many stops in Queens.

Heh. I think what probably happened was that Bill got jealous when Nimoy was at the helm for IV and whined: "I wanna make a picture too!"

I wonder if the 2 people (as of this writing) who voted for Doom will come out and post their rationale. This battle royale seems pretty one sided right now.

[fragbert.livejournal.com]

Last Crusade.

Two words: SEAN FUCKING CONNERY.

[offbalance.livejournal.com]

RIGHT FUCKING ON!!

[(Anonymous)]

Despite a fondness for the ripping-out-the-heart scene, the whole child-labor subplot has always soured me to Temple of Doom. So Last Crusade wins hands down.
- Daryl

[offbalance.livejournal.com]

Totally - I can applaud Lucas and Spielberg for wanting to try for something darker, but I feel like they went a bit overboard in Temple of Doom.

Thanks for voting! :)

[dar-actually.livejournal.com]

Last Crusade for the win.
I'm not getting my hopes up for Crystal Skull. I'm still gonna see it, but getting your hopes up that a movie is going to be spectacular when it has Shia LaDouche in it like sticking your genitals between a steel vice, hooking the leaver up to a pneumatic piledriver and psyching yourself up for the best sexual experience of your life.

Trust me, after Crystal Skull, you're gonna look back on Temple Of Doom with fondness that at least that little cretin wasn't in it.

[offbalance.livejournal.com]

Honestly, I don't think I recall seeing anything Shia has done. But that's one hell of an image.

I'll wait until I see it - or you could wait and see, then put up a poll if Shia or Short Round were more annoying. That might be a closer race than I'm witnessing...

[dar-actually.livejournal.com]

One word: Transformers.
Short Round was downright cute compared to the sheer douchebaggery of the guy who actually makes you think the Decepticons are in the right when it comes to wiping out the human race. I mean, yeah, it's six billion people, but at least it's one less douche.

[hermionesviolin.livejournal.com]

I don't think I've ever seen an Indiana Jones movie all the way through, but I remember once watching bits and pieces of one with Sean Connery and really being not a fan (my dad was watching in the living room, and I would come out and watch and then leave and then come back &c).

[offbalance.livejournal.com]

You're not the only one to tell me this, honestly. If you were curious, I'd suggest you watch Raiders of the Lost Ark. If you're not, well, then that's fine too! :) They're not for everyone, I guess.

[hermionesviolin.livejournal.com]

I suspect it's the kind of action movie I could enjoy, I'd just never gotten around to making the effort to watch any of them.

[offbalance.livejournal.com]

I think you would, too. But there are so many other things to watch, and read and see - I know how it feels when you feel like you can't possibly get to them all.

[first-lobster.livejournal.com]

Hahaha poor Temple of Doom. I guess no one loves eating monkey brains...

[offbalance.livejournal.com]

While popular in Cantonese Cuisine, they are not often found in Washington, D.C.!

[quasisonic.livejournal.com]

1+2+2+1!!!

[offbalance.livejournal.com]

Communism was just a RED herring!

[stacyinthecity.livejournal.com]

Raiders is clearly the best, but out of the 2 in the poll, last crusade wins hands down!

[offbalance.livejournal.com]

Oh, absolutely!

(and nice icon choice!)

mmm...

[quantumchick.livejournal.com]

::craves your dad's matzo bri::

Re: mmm...

[offbalance.livejournal.com]

They're soooo delicious!

[teany.livejournal.com]

Not to be *that* person, but it's Matzoh Brei (or sometimes Brie), not the shortened form of the name Brian. ;)

[offbalance.livejournal.com]

Thanks. As I was typing out the entry, it occurred to me that I didn't have the foggiest idea how to spell it!

[trappedinabay.livejournal.com]

The boyfriend may be wonderful on all other fronts, but on this one, he needs his head examined! ;)

[offbalance.livejournal.com]

Now, now. Everyone has a right to their own opinion!

No matter how wrong it may be...

[lwoodbloo.livejournal.com]

I was an anthropology major for a reason. And that reason was Raiders of the Lost Ark.

Bubam.

[rhinoplastique.livejournal.com]

I'll give the nod to Last Crusade, but I honestly do like Temple. No argument re: Kate Capshaw, though.

I definitely remember seeing both of 'em in the theater. Not 100 percent sure about Raiders, though...I'll have to ask my mom.

Scarily enough, I actually remember seeing TV spots for the original Star Wars.

[dotfic.livejournal.com]

Temple of Doom gets to exist and I rewatch it and laugh and enjoy it for the fact that it's Indiana Jones. Otherwise, it's a mess. There are scenes I like, and Willie amuses me.

The Last Crusade is just a wonderful MOVIE, plus it's Indiana Jones!

OMG I AM SEEING CRYSTAL SKULL TOMORROW NIGHT11!1ELEVENTY

[theatre-pixie.livejournal.com]

I am not convinced that Raiders of the Lost Ark is the best of the three, truth be told. I'd say that The Last Crusade definitely gives it a run for its money.

Temple of Doom is SOOO not my cuppa. I will watch brief portions on rare occasions, but only if the small and amusing Asian child is around (I loved that kid in Goonies!).
Kate Capshaw is probably the most annoying leading woman ever.