The Misadventures of a Native New Yorker

It's been a rough couple of days.

Started off Saturday a bit hung over, because redstapler was in town, and that required a toast or three. After I got J off to work, I decided to do some coat shopping. I was off today and I figured that might be the better day to spend on the sofa. After fruitless trips to Syms and Century 21, I was browsing in Bloomingdales when I got phone call.

A really fucking bad phone call. The kind of phone call that you really never expect nor want to receive.

I have this friend Gyda, a lot of you know her. Gyda was supposed to marry her lovely fiance, Aaron, in about a month, down in the Cayman Islands.

Gyda's fiance died Saturday morning.

They were supposed to be visiting her dad's new place in New England this weekend, and he was supposed to be on a certain train at a certain time. When he wasn't, they called a friend to check on him. They'd discovered that Aaron, at 42 years of age, had passed away in his sleep.

We're all in shock. Her the worst of it, clearly.

I didn't know him super-well. He wasn't outgoing or gregarious - he actually played it pretty close to the vest most of the time. But I did know some important things about him. He was a super-sweet guy under a tough-seeming shell. He lacked pretension and bullshit. And most importantly, he loved my friend more than anything. His entire face changed when he smiled, but when he smiled at her? The world was almost a different place, you could tell. Over time, we learned we had a few things in common, especially since he was a huge fan of many of the cult tv shows I was. We'd bonded over Veronica Mars at least once when I expressed glee over seeing it on Gyda's shelf and she told me her seeing it was entirely Aaron's doing.

The other thing about Aaron was how talented he was. Both of them are heavily involved in the Brick Theater and I'd gotten to see him perform many times. He was a really gifted actor. I'd seen him do a number of very different kinds of things, and many times, he was the very best thing on the stage.

I wish I'd spoken to him more times with fewer beers in my system. You always think you're going to have more time.

My heart is breaking for Gyda right now. As she said over and over, between sobs, when I saw her on Saturday was that this was the worst thing ever...the worst thing imaginable. And I agree. I can't think of anything worse. Especially for someone as awesome, loyal, selfless and loving as Gyda is. I wish I could do more than feel for her, but right now that's all that can be done. And it sucks. She's one of the very best people I know, and I believed wholeheartedly that he was completely worthy of her. Neither of them deserved this. As one person kept saying at the gathering Saturday, they were both cheated out of a life together. And I think that sums it up.

I started writing a post yesterday to update everyone on my latest happenings, but it was totally saturated with wedding shit. So I toddled over to Offbeat Bride and dumped it there, and will probably cross post to weddingplans at some point. But that shit just isn't interesting, unless you're me. Suffice it to say, things are going well.

I just did some organization in the kitchen, and a little bit of cleaning up as well. I'll soon be on my way to doing the same in the living room. My only problem is Doctor Who.

See, I was stuck in the Tennant movie portions of the DW-verse for awhile, and honestly, they're no great shakes. Other than the Christmas Episode that featured the Blackpool reunion (OMG! Tennant and Morrisey! Together again!) and the two-part one that ended Tennant's Tenure, it was kind of meh. So I got behind. But, I finally finished them off the other day and started on Eleven and Season 5.

OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD YOU GUYS. I LOVE.

Matt Smith is fabulous. I love how off-the-wall he is, as it addresses the fact that maybe this bloke isn't all there, but rather than suffering from madness, he's enjoying every last second of it. And Amelia Pond! Amy! <3 I didn't know I could love someone more than Donna, but there you go. I'm in the middle of the third episode of s5 and I'm all *chinhands* with this season. That's not a problem, per se, but I only have these on my computer, and the way my living room is set up it'd be quite a bit easier if I could stream them on my tv, but netflix is being a big old poophead and not offering them. I'm going to have no problem catching up in short order, and will likely be able to pick up S2 in an episode or two more. (I have the Christmas special and the first two episodes of S6 downloaded and waiting).

As much as I enjoyed Tennant, this really gave the show a much-needed shot in the arm. Kudos to all, and I can't wait for more!! (Especially with all the non-spoiler squee I've been hearing about Series 6).

Justified, Supernatural and The Vampire Diaries also continue to rock my world. And I'm very much liking Deadwood, which I've been getting from Netflix, one disc at a time.

I'd say I'd be watching DW on my ipod to and from work, but the only problem there is that the Brooklyn Public Library delivered unto me the newest Charlaine Harris Sookie book. That is priority over most things, so that will be hogging much of my commute time.

Otherwise, things are pretty good. I'm trying to find a balance where I say social but don't ruin myself financially, mentally or emotionally. I'm a person who needs her downtime, and a little bit of solitary time to stay on an even keel. I always forget and must remind myself that it's Okay to Say No. If you need time to yourself, if something isn't good FOR YOU, It's Okay to Say No. And save yourself for truly awesome occasions. Like last night - j_bkl and I headed to Gleason's to see blergeatkitty fight (and she was excellent, btw) and then we had a marvelous dinner with Blerg, kip3f, teany & selftoken. All told, it was a lovely evening. I have to remind myself to get off the treadmill and take more time for me, and make sure I have more down time. My mental state isn't great when I am so busy running around that I don't have time to tidy up, make food, or just be still and quiet. As much as I love my friends (which is a lot), I'm no good to anyone if I'm on my last nerve.

And one last thing to add- I made a fabulous batch of arugula pesto just now! I was faced with a nearly-deceased and under-utilized batch of arugula, and rather than try to eat it all or despair, I simply threw it in the food processor with some olive oil and garlic, salt and pepper, and PRESTO PESTO! \o/

First of all, I absolutely must wish a happy birthday to killerweasel, one of my favorite journalers these days. She posts a fabulous amount of stuff, which makes me look cool, because I get to see all the memes and read all the geeky articles before they break wide. She always gets them first. And she's a cool person besides. Happy birthday, and congrats on your new job!!

Secondly, I'd like to wish all and sundry a happy Jameson appreciation day. XD Personally, I prefer to avoid bars like the plague on this kind of amateur night, but enjoy to those who are celebrating. I had some soda bread for breakfast, we'll see what comes later. (After Frankenstein, anyway. Really excited about that!!!)

I got to see The Fighter this morning, and it was excellent. I highly recommend it if you haven't seen it.

And, in the spirit of the holiday:

This morning I had my second wedding-related nightmare. Have I mentioned that my actual wedding date is over a year away? Because it is.

It basically involved this weird mashup of places and people, both real and imaginary. I got to the place I was getting ready at, which was some weird, colonial-style farmhouse. What's more, the only way to get into or out of this house is by crawling through these tiny openings, which would be hard for even teany or redstapler to finagle, let alone me. But I did somehow. I ran around, my hair unwashed, my dress a mess, no idea where to find my shoes, what my vows were, and fucked if I remember what else I was looking for, but there was a lot of panicked running. I lost my ipod, then I couldn't find my bridal party. Just like my last wedding nightmare, I'd forgotten to put on makeup. This time I streaked some on badly at the last minute. Then, I crawled out the crazy door, and found myself in this supremely run down movie theater, a cross between a few in Brooklyn I remember (particularly the old Kingsway, for those who remember that place). And I couldn't find my wedding. Anywhere. I wandered into and out of movies with crowds and theaters that evoked Times Square of old, searching. I kept looking around for J, but there was no J. Everyone around me kept obsessing about my vows, but I wasn't, I knew exactly what to say to J, but I looked a fright and felt worse. As I was about to trip over my dress and plummet down a flight of wide stairs covered in a ratty, stained carpet, I woke up. What the hell, brain. What the hell. I don't even know where I get this shit sometimes.

And yesterday was great, too. I mean, it started off with no heat or hot water and several angry phone calls. But!
1. I found out I have the kind of friends who will offer a shower if desperately needed. (Thank you quodlibetic, reppep, and eatsdirt!)
2. I have the kind of sister who will drop everything and come and get me if I needed her. (Which is why the dream was so weird. She's at least one member of my bridal militia that I know would bungee-cord me to a chair and apply my makeup and fix my hair before letting me go out looking a fright for my own wedding).
3. The building got the water back on in 3 hours. Not bad.

I had time to shower before heading out to a friend's baby shower. Now, I've been to baby showers, but this was way better. Were it not for a few elements and baby-specific activities, this was like no baby shower I've ever been to. Among the things I really liked was that it was coed, there was beer, and there was an absence of the cutesy. Our incredible hostess made two pans of baked ziti, plus there was garlic bread, and cake, and lots of tasty snacks. But, it was just a good time surrounded by lots and lots of good people I don't see NEARLY ENOUGH OF. It was also the first baby shower where I didn't feel like booking it towards the door right at the buzzer. No one did. But then again, there were few enforced activities and no enforced seating (both good things). And baby-themed Win Lose or Draw was pretty damn fun. Plus, an idea I am totally stealing is a design-a-onesie corner, where sharpies were on offer and guests were encouraged to decorate plain white onesies with more personalized designs and messages. The results were amazing. If all baby showers were this awesome, I think more people would be excited to attend. It was an excellent day, and one I needed more than I realized.

And now I want something special for breakfast. Were lwoodbloo not off in Geneseo for the weekend I'd see if he were up to some Purple Yam or Cinco de Mayo. Not sure what I will do instead. I'm off to a good friend's bday later this evening, and then OFF FROM WORK FOR TWO DAYS. GLORY HALLELUJAH.

Yes, yes, I know - I owe a longer update, and you'll all get one later.

But first order of business - this boss new icon, which was sent to me by redstapler.

Secondly, I haz a new friend, thanks to this hilarious thread on sf_drama.

Say hello to littlegirlvik, everybody!

I just wanted to show her that there are more of us normal, non-stalker, non-rabbit-boiling SPN fans out there than a wide swath of fandom might have you believe. Now, granted, there are fans of the show that resemble the infamous Mr. Belvedere sketch on SNL from years ago. But there are many of us who are really quite sane (relatively speaking *cough*) that love our Winchesters. So, I invite all of you to comment here - Say It Loud - I'm SPN, I'm Not Psycho, and I'm proud!

(I am also currently reviewing the mix I put together that I'm considering a Supernatural Soundtrack. Who wants to review the playlist and make suggestions?)

Today is a special day for me. It's also a day marking a weird (or possibly not-so-weird) coincidence.

See, not one, but TWO of my very best friends have today as a birthday. September 8, 1979 gave the world blergeatkitty and September 8, 1980 gave the world Carly. And I honestly have no idea what I'd do without either of them.

So, in honor and celebration of this hallowed day, I give you....Rick Astley. (Well, mostly I give him to blergeatkitty. Because.)

I've done a few things this weekend:

I've finally finished S3 of Doctor Who (the reboot, that is). And I was quite pleased. I also procured "Voyage of the Damned" to watch on my ipod, so I can get back on the horse with some S4.

I made it back to Corner Bistro. And I have to say, with the right people, the right night, and the right bartender, there are far worse places to grab a burger and a beer. (They have McSorley's on tap for $2.50. Yes, you read that correctly.) The Bistro burger is a succulent pillow of meat, topped with crispy bacon and American cheese. I got an appreciative smile from the bartender as I tried to stretch the last few bites Friday night. They really know what the hell they're doing over there. Why do I never remember to go during summer hours? (I've been watching several hours' worth of Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations. Can't you tell?)

Saturday I got a chance to do something I've never done before: go to the Jersey Shore. katiebea invited me down, and I got to take in the sights of Asbury Park and Red Bank for the day. It was an excellent time - I finally had some good onion rings, and got to spend some time in, of all things, a pinball museum. A++. Asbury was a beautiful combination of new development and recovering blight. And as someone who on occasion finds decaying buildings beautiful, I was really taken with the buildings we saw. Red Bank is an adorable little town - filled with appealing eateries and shopping (and I finally got to make my pilgrimage to Jay & Silent Bob's Secret Stash. I bought a comic. It was smaller than I was expecting, but I've finally been. The guy behind the counter was watching Mystery Science Theater 3000. If I lived nearby, I'd be back.) We finished the day at a great Mexican place called Carlos O'Connor's. I only wish my stomach had been equal to the challenge, but it was still delicious, and a day filled with good company, too.

Sunday I spent the day watching movies, eating donuts, and drinking wine with airspaniel. Now that was aces. Except I think we overdid it on the crap food after a rather nice home-made brunch of eggs, sausage and a potato-onion-Worcestershire sauce combo airspaniel suggested that I am SO making next time I get my hands on some potatoes. Hot damn. Mostly it was just fun to chill at home.

Today J and I spent some time with my folks, which was also very nice. I was relieved to discover that it is indeed possible to get good whole wheat pancakes outside of the home, as I feared I couldn't after a visit to a Hoboken pancake house earlier this summer. Then we came home, finally watched the last two episodes of Friday Night Lights, had a snack, and just took it easy. I needed that so very much. So very much. I honestly felt really worn out - I don't know if it was due to a specific cause or several causes together - I was just exhausted.

I've been kicking back and watching Bourdain and Buffy, two great tastes that go great together. And I can still say the dialogue along with all of Buffy/Angel scenes in "The Prom," and "Graduation Day parts I&II." No, really. It's kind of disturbing. And still so frigging good. I've been tinkering around with a fic that involves Buffy, Sookie, and Elena from the Vampire Diaries sitting Bella Swan down for an "Oh, honey, NO" type conversation about her relationship. But I'd also really love to write out Buffy and Sookie shooting the shit about all the drama they've endured in their relationships and comparing notes. Because that would entertain me. And Vampire Diaries comes back on Thursday, which positively delights me.

Tomorrow is back to the grind and trivia after! The good part is that we're back to normal hours as of tomorrow. Start by 9, leave at 5. I'm so delighted by this, I don't even care that I no longer get to leave early on Friday. On the balance? This is WAY better. Way better.

And now to make some lunch and get to sleep.

The overwhelming theme for this weekend was Friends are awesome.

I spent as much time as possible as I could with redstapler. Three days straight, practically.

I finally, finally, finally got to meet firynze in person, and I'm pleased that she's even more awesome off the intertubes. No, it's okay, you can be shocked if you need to. We had a fabulous time, both at a brunch with redstapler, rockradar, airspaniel, valjean615 (and friend!), where we got to be *that table* in the restaurant. I love being That Table. The one having such a raucous good time that the other tables are STARING. Then we went to Target. That was Saturday.

I made a new friend, the fabulous thunderemerald. redstapler, firynze, thunderemerald and I had a fabulous time Saturday night, in a many-hour discourse of All Things Geeky. It was positively spectacular. It's so nice to find similarly-minded people in the universe, especially ones who share the same taste in books and television. Of course, I had to flap my gums about my SUPER AWESOME Supernatural mix, only to come home and find that it didn't, in fact, survive the hard drive apocalypse the way I thought it did. No matter - if Dean could rebuild the Metallicar, I can rebuild my playlist. I have the technology!! I just have to figure out what was on it and what should be on it (other than a metric ton of AC/DC. I didn't realize I had as much as I do, but I'm seeing this as a plus). I'm trying to add in stuff that's been used on the show, mentioned on the show, or would fit in just fine on the show. So, after these messages, we'll be right back.

The Fourth was spectacular from start to finish - redstapler, firynze and I met up with our friend L to go to the beach. L has a car. We got to the beach around 9:30 and left just as it was getting unbearably hot and crowded (around 12:30). I got to SWIM. In actual OCEAN. It felt amazing, and I plan to do it again, soon. After a stop at Sav-A-Thon so people could make craftacular purchases, I went home, showered, and re-rendezvoused with firynze to hit two absolutely excellent parties celebrating the birth of our great nation. I watched pretty fireworks go boom, played a bizarre board game, and drank a spectacular bourbon ice tea. God Bless America.

I just...too much awesome. There was so much, I was completely shattered this morning. But it was well worth it. I was able to drag myself to the grocery store to buy a metric ton of foodstuffs that will keep us sorted for quite some time (minus the perishables, but those are easier to replace). The goal was to not need to go and do a huge shopping for some time, and mission accomplished. I then came home, and began cooking. I made pulled pork. I made roasted vegetables. AND: I made zucchini fritters. From a recipe from my csa. They were a bitch to make (grated onion? I wanted to die), but DELICIOUS. I'm trying to find a digital copy of the recipe so I can post here. But it's true - if something smells and tastes a little extra delicious, it's because of butter.

Tomorrow is back to work, beginning the countdown, which is NINE workdays until vacation. NINE. \o/ You guys, I can not put into words how excited I am about this. Because I am so frigging hot and tired. So instead of trying to string together thought, I'm going to go take a nice cool shower and sleep.

- I spent a good chunk of the day with redstapler. Always a recipe for a good day, especially when you add gaztherat to the mix (and a liberal application of Daria). I so need the boxed set - I don't miss the incidental music at all, which just goes to show how well that show was written.

redstapler and I had brunch at Oak & Iris beforehand. It was delicious. A++, would nom again. Also, it had a really nice vibe and staff. AND signs that said "No running and screaming allowed." <3

- Also:
Me: also, I managed to hurt my foot with bread yesterday. WITH BREAD.
redstapler: I...what?
Me: I bought this baguette from Whole Paycheck on Thursday. So, yesterday I cut a few pieces off to nom on and then put the loaf back in the fridge in its bag. Only, it slid through the bag, and the pointy part of the baguette hurt the soft part of my instep. I think this qualifies me for a Tonks badge.
redstapler: ...ow. And lol.

(I am going to miss the hell out of her when she moves.)

- Last night j_bkl and I caught the rescheduled Kings of Convenience show at Webster Hall. They were awesome. I was only dimly aware of maybe one of their songs prior to last night, but that didn't matter one bit. The music was really incredible - each member played acoustic guitar and sang with really incredible harmonies. They also had one of the best opening acts I've seen in ages, a west coast band by the name of Franklin For Short that I loved so much I ran down and bought their album (a real vinyl one with a download coupon) before the set was completely over. Their music, to me, sounds like what it would be like to drive down the Pacific Coast Highway with no traffic, the sun in the sky and the wind in my hair. J described their sound as "the love child of Jackson Browne and Death Cab for Cutie." I think that's accurate. And, they joined the Kings for a few songs too, which was a nice blending of styles.

- I had my first CSA pickup this week! It was a few hours late (the delivery truck had some trouble), but I still was able to pick up and enjoy some incredible greens! We got arugula, broccoli rabe, spinach, lettuce, and japanese turnips. I made a dish with the broccoli rabe friday and I've slowly been eating the arugula, and I have designs on that spinach, do I ever. It's so exciting to have so much green to enjoy!

- Those of you who follow me on Facebook may have noticed that I've been goofing off with Foursquare recently. It's dumb, and/or it's fun, depending on your worldview. If it really offends you, blame redesigner, he's the one who talked me into it. It has no point whatsoever, it's kind of the digital version of "Yes, but have you got a flag?" I've wasted time on worse. For now, I'm enjoying it.

- I have jury duty tomorrow. It's Federal Court, which I've heard is more organized than Supreme/City court. We shall see.

- After reading this article which was linked on weddingplans, I reserved this book at the library. I'm kind of loving how there's a growing number of people out there who are as disgusted as I am with these overblown, insanity-fest weddings that try to be a combination of prom night, new year's eve, the academy awards and a three-ring circus. I'm even gladder that the disgust is building into backlash, and I'm looking forward to reading it to see what Miss Manners has to say about fighting this insanity and throwing a nice affair anyhow.

- I didn't get the above book for my kindle because my new kindle rule is that if I can get it for free at the library with not too long of a wait, that's what I do first. If the library doesn't have it or the wait is ridiculous, then, I can kindle. But there's no point spending money when you don't have to. (that said, I did make a donation to the Brooklyn Public Library in order to hopefully help with their budgetary shortfall.)

- Further on the wedding front: I realized that I'm nervous about going wedding dress shopping. I'm nervous because of how you have to shop for one. See, most (if not all) of my shopping is done in stores where very few salespeople lurk. I prefer to be left to my own devices to browse, examine, try on and what have you. 99% of the time I don't need help, other than to accept a friendly offer to start a dressing room for me or to ring up my purchases (or maybe zip/unzip the occasional zipper). But, a wedding dress must be bought in a really old-fashioned, particular way that involves making an appointment, going to a showroom, having an appointed salesperson select things for you and be up your nose the entire time. I hate this style of shopping, mostly because I feel insanely pressured by it. It's not just me obtaining items I need or want. It's about me worrying about this person in front of me, and how their livelihood depends on a sale, and how if I spend a few hours looking and don't see anything I want, I will have deprived them of a customer who might have bought something and/or the all-important commission/mortgage payment/rent/etc. And, I'm sure this person, smelling blood in the water, will push this to make a sale, as is their way (the scorpion always bites the turtle, after all). I was a little more worried about it before than I am now, though. I talked to my mom about it. She'd originally said that while she'd love to go dress shopping with me, but I shouldn't worry if I just wanted to go myself or with friends, because she wouldn't be hurt and insulted and it's all about what works best for me and all that. Now, that was never an issue, I love shopping with my mom and I always have fun doing so (mom and I have had a blast grocery shopping together, for crying out loud.). But after telling her this, she said I shouldn't worry about ANYONE pressuring me into buying anything, because that shit wouldn't fly on her watch. (also, quasisonic wouldn't let that go down on her watch either, to be fair).

(and yes. I also know that I don't HAVE to buy dresses this way, I could just order them off the internet. But, I don't know exactly what dress I want, and I want to be able to try a bunch on, and it's a much bigger pain in the ass to ship wedding dresses back and forth from China than it is to suck it up and bring a protective entourage into a bridal boutique with me.)

- Speaking of buying things off the internet, I need sandals like woah. I've not had much luck this season. Not much is appealing to me. Best keep looking, I guess.

Oh, so many people to wish things to!

Happy happy birthday wishes to:

shackledangel!

nemesisbecoming!

And to all and sundry (especially my family) Happy Groundhog Day!! :D