Rules of Engagement
Jun. 9th, 2008 03:36 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
offbalanceYesterday, J and I (as well as several of his friends) boarded buses and headed out to the wilds of New Jersey for an engagement party. One of his friends had decided to propose, and that friend's family was throwing a brunch to celebrate.
Of course, that's only the tip of the iceberg. We were told "casual brunch." What we found there was an elaborately catered affair, with attendants carrying trays of puffed pastry-type things, a bartender station, party favors, rented tables, and the whole nine yards. It felt like a wedding, quite honestly.
The guests of honor arrived not too long after we did. The host's sister proposed to her girlfriend in private, but surprised her with the party. And, the host's sister was in turn surprised by her mother, who had flown in all the way from France for the occasion. There were champagne toasts and heartfelt speeches about how happy the families of both women (all of whom were present and beaming) were that they'd found one another. I got choked up more than once. There was tons of hugging and crying and a piece of cake was even shoved in someone's face, bride-and-groom style. It was a great party, and a really fun day, and the whole thing made me really happy.
At the same time I was a little sad. I really, honestly, do not understand why it can't be this way for everyone. Why any family (or any person, really) wouldn't be able to celebrate the fact that two people have fallen in love and want to spend their lives together. Why anyone would have a problem with such a display of love and happiness and commitment is beyond me, but there are a lot of things I don't understand. Maybe one day we'll one day live in a world filled with people who are flabbergasted when they discover that there used to be so many stupid restrictions placed on marriage in this country. I can only hope.
Of course, that's only the tip of the iceberg. We were told "casual brunch." What we found there was an elaborately catered affair, with attendants carrying trays of puffed pastry-type things, a bartender station, party favors, rented tables, and the whole nine yards. It felt like a wedding, quite honestly.
The guests of honor arrived not too long after we did. The host's sister proposed to her girlfriend in private, but surprised her with the party. And, the host's sister was in turn surprised by her mother, who had flown in all the way from France for the occasion. There were champagne toasts and heartfelt speeches about how happy the families of both women (all of whom were present and beaming) were that they'd found one another. I got choked up more than once. There was tons of hugging and crying and a piece of cake was even shoved in someone's face, bride-and-groom style. It was a great party, and a really fun day, and the whole thing made me really happy.
At the same time I was a little sad. I really, honestly, do not understand why it can't be this way for everyone. Why any family (or any person, really) wouldn't be able to celebrate the fact that two people have fallen in love and want to spend their lives together. Why anyone would have a problem with such a display of love and happiness and commitment is beyond me, but there are a lot of things I don't understand. Maybe one day we'll one day live in a world filled with people who are flabbergasted when they discover that there used to be so many stupid restrictions placed on marriage in this country. I can only hope.
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no subject
Date: 2008-06-10 04:22 am (UTC)