offbalance: (mm serious as german film)
[personal profile] offbalance
Another night, another ridiculously loud party.  It's not quite as loud as Saturday night's earbuster, but it's close.

So, I've decided upon a plan*.

Step 1: Buy/rent/borrow/steal one of those giant speaker trucks they use to flush out cults.

Step 2:  Borrow one of [livejournal.com profile] redesigner 's Barry Manilow CDs.

Step 3: Go to site of last night's extreme noise, shortly after sunrise.

Step 4: Crank up the rig.

Step 5: Utilize ear protection.

Step 6: PROFIT. 

My only hesitation is I'm not sure what song to start on.   "I Write the Songs,"  seems like an appealing choice, as does "Can't Smile Without You."  Or there's always "Copacabana"  or "Mandy."   Of course, any Fanilows out there with suggestions, please leave them in a comment.  I don't plan to use "Weekend in New England," as I actually think it's kind of pretty (shush).    

*of course the actual plan is installing my a/c, which should block out 90% of this bullcrap.   However, if I had the means, I would totally do what I describe above.

Date: 2009-05-26 01:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] firynze.livejournal.com
No no, sweetheart. You're doing it all wrong.

1812 Overture, followed by Conway Twitty. Then loop.

(I have, in fact, done this. It does, in fact, work.)

Date: 2009-05-26 01:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] offbalance.livejournal.com
Why is that wrong?

(and do tell the story!!)

Date: 2009-05-26 01:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] firynze.livejournal.com
Too many people enjoy Barry Manilow. And you need something that can shake things with the bass.

Hence the 1812 Overture.

Conway Twitty is just for insult. And to lull them into a false sense of security before the Overture loops back on.

(sophomore year, I had a great suite, on a lousy floor. They were all stoners - and my roommate and I are allergic to pot smoke. And the girls across the hall delighted in turning up some sort of horrible caterwauling country-western yodelling music with harmonica, so loud it shook our walls, and then LEAVING and locking their door. So...I called Campus Safety, warned them about what I was going to do [there were a couple sympathetic guys on the squad], and borrowed my friend's really powerful subwoofer setup. 1812 Overture and Conway Twitty. On loop. For six hours. Campus Safety told the girls, when they complained, that they deserved it.)

Date: 2009-05-26 01:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] offbalance.livejournal.com
Trust me. In this neighborhood, no one likes Barry Manilow.

I do concur about the 1812, though, that would be interesting. I just fear it's a bit cliched. What about the Ride of the Valkyries? Too Apocalypse Now?

Sounds like campus security rocked. Well played, also. Very clever.

Date: 2009-05-26 02:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] firynze.livejournal.com
You really need the cannons. The cannons are what make it, especially with a good enough subwoofer.

Although I had considered Also Sprach Zarathustra and some Katchatourian as backups...

(Ride of the Valkyries only if you're charging in there with a sword. Which would be warranted, given the situation)

Date: 2009-05-27 02:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] quodlibetic.livejournal.com
Brilliant. Simply brilliant. :)

Date: 2009-05-27 02:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] firynze.livejournal.com
*sweeps a bow*

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